In Philippians 2:3 it says
3 Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself.
Its right here in Philippians 2:3, we find what we call “The 2:3 Factor.” God told us in Philippians 2:3, to esteem others better than ourselves. Esteem means “to value.” When you esteem someone better than yourself, you “value” them. The words “honor” and “respect” communicate the same ideas. In our society today, people are failing to value each other. We see it at the store, at the gas pump, in our workplaces, in our neighborhoods, even in our own families. And yes… married couples are failing to value each other too. This is a big area where the enemy is effective in damaging marriages and relationships.
Now, esteeming others better than yourself is not something that happens automatically. We have to be intentional to honor, respect and value others. We have to exercise it. And especially after you have been with someone for a long time. The longer we know our spouse, the more we have to watch that we don’t give in to the temptation to judge them based on our feelings and give in to being over familiar with them. If those things happen, we can get to the place where we no longer value them! Remember, esteeming is not automatic, it’s not natural to our physical bodies. We have to be purposeful in esteeming our spouse better than ourself.
Now Philippians 2:3 also tells us what we should avoid and why we should avoid it. If we look again at what we call the 2:3 factor, God says don’t be selfish, don’t do anything out of selfish ambition and conceit.
I particularly like the amplified translation to help us out here.
Philippians 2:3 AMP
Do nothing from factional motives [through contentiousness, strife, selfishness, or for unworthy ends] or prompted by conceit and empty arrogance. Instead, in the true spirit of humility (lowliness of mind) let each regard the others as better than and superior to himself [thinking more highly of one another than you do of yourselves].
This tells us to avoid contentiousness, selfishness, STRIFE! STRIFE disrupts the harmony in a marriage. All these things; contentiousness, selfishness, strife, they cause DIVISION! One of Satan’s tactics is to divide us. Strife is evidence that DIVISION is working and that the enemy is being effective. Anytime we detect some strife in our marriage, it should set off an alarm for us. And we should not allow it to go any further.
When we are practicing the 2:3 factor and we are truly esteeming our spouse as better than ourself, its being obedient to God and His Word. And when we walk in that kind of obedience we’ll begin to harvest good things in our marriage. It’ll be like ripe fruit just falling off a tree, things will begin to work. It WILL bring results. Things will change in our marriage as we do what God’s Word tells us to do.
Remember it. The 2:3 Factor. In Philippians 2:3 God said, “Don’t do these things, but rather do these things.” When it comes to your marriage, avoid things like selfishness and think more highly of your spouse than you do of yourself!
